








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 432 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 430 matches | ||
| Faceit | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 89 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




61 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7436 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,909 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3235 | 18% |
| Smokes | 4927 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 5331 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 4416 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,454,980 of utility $185 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5367 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kami | 68% | 84 |
| #2 | Ian | 59% | 44 |
| #3 | KAJUIN | 58% | 38 |
| #4 | hydroking | 57% | 202 |
| #5 | Damikester | 55% | 187 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Damikester | 55% | 187 |
| #6 | tractorman69 | 53% | 146 |
| #7 | Cpt. Murphy | 53% | 57 |
| #8 | AssGasket | 52% | 112 |
| #9 | NorinTheWary | 48% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hydroking | 12 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | tractorman69 | 8 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | KAJUIN | 8 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | Damikester | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Cpt. Murphy | 6 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hydroking | 578 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| #2 | Damikester | 411 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | tractorman69 | 366 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #4 | kami | 338 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #5 | KAJUIN | 209 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bort | +2.59 | 79 | 56 |
| #2 | kami | +2.28 | 91 | 68 |
| #3 | Ian | +1.24 | 69 | 67 |
| #4 | Damikester | +1.07 | 84 | 51 |
| #5 | tractorman69 | +0.36 | 61 | 65 |





