








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 469 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2153 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,176 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1633 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1158 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1818 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1567 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $910,262 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 380 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cofee Monkey | 63% | 56 |
| #2 | TBone | 58% | 64 |
| #3 | terry | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | sympetaly | 54% | 24 |
| #5 | Steve François | 52% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Steve François | 52% | 112 |
| #6 | Koenigsegg | 51% | 39 |
| #7 | Ron Jennings | 48% | 89 |
| #8 | weakbox ★ | 44% | 78 |
| #9 | ✞ | 43% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✞ | 22 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | Steve François | 18 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | weakbox ★ | 10 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | Koenigsegg | 8 | 0.0127 |
| #5 | Ron Jennings | 5 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ron Jennings | 438 | 0.24 | 13 min |
| #2 | Steve François | 283 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | weakbox ★ | 265 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #4 | Cofee Monkey | 235 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #5 | ✞ | 179 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ron Jennings | +8.55 | 77 | 77 |
| #2 | Cofee Monkey | +8.04 | 64 | 76 |
| #3 | sympetaly | +1.07 | 71 | 30 |
| #4 | Steve François | +0.83 | 71 | 52 |
| #5 | weakbox ★ | -0.99 | 75 | 60 |





