








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 204 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1414 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,107 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 183 | 17% |
| Smokes | 324 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 391 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 209 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $921,063 of utility $282 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Elkku | 53% | 15 |
| #8 | Tumppu | 50% | 16 |
| #9 | daNbee | 40% | 15 |
| #10 | diskela banditcamp.com | 38% | 13 |
| #11 | Maiko ;) | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0N1Z | 8 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | diskela banditcamp.com | 6 | 0.0256 |
| #3 | daNbee | 3 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | Tumppu | 2 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | Elkku | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J0N1Z | 145 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | BLOXI | 129 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | daNbee | 82 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #4 | P3PE | 71 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | diskela banditcamp.com | 49 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumppu | +7.69 | 94 | 42 |
| #2 | BLOXI | +6.44 | 77 | 71 |
| #3 | S4MI | +4.95 | 81 | 57 |
| #4 | daNbee | +4.04 | 63 | 62 |
| #5 | P3PE | +2.23 | 59 | 62 |





