








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 580 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1657 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,769 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 418 | 24% |
| Smokes | 405 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 527 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 419 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $315,756 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 468 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Barbie | 56% | 48 |
| #2 | WhereU | 55% | 73 |
| #3 | numi | 52% | 77 |
| #4 | goblin machine | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | Suvalind | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Barbie | 56% | 48 |
| #2 | WhereU | 55% | 73 |
| #3 | numi | 52% | 77 |
| #4 | goblin machine | 50% | 22 |
| #5 | Suvalind | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | numi | 14 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | Suvalind | 5 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | goblin machine | 4 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | WhereU | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Barbie | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | numi | 44 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | WhereU | 23 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #3 | Suvalind | 9 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | Barbie | 6 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | goblin machine | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | numi | +4.42 | 88 | 38 |
| #2 | Suvalind | +0.52 | 67 | 24 |
| #3 | goblin machine | -0.37 | 77 | 21 |
| #4 | Bao | -0.43 | 57 | 31 |
| #5 | WhereU | -0.46 | 36 | 32 |





