








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 103 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2419 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,719 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1150 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1131 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1339 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1099 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $418,982 of utility $98 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Minick | 52% | 97 |
| #7 | Terpahun | 51% | 61 |
| #8 | cig | 47% | 95 |
| #9 | ☠oloo☠ | 40% | 25 |
| #10 | Constellation | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cig | 19 | 0.0109 |
| #2 | Minick | 6 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | dani3h | 6 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | Cpt.PingWIN ❥✞ | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Terpahun | 5 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Minick | 496 | 0.26 | 10 min |
| #2 | cig | 297 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #3 | Cpt.PingWIN ❥✞ | 247 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | h1treg | 133 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | dani3h | 119 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dani3h | +6.50 | 74 | 64 |
| #2 | cig | +4.65 | 66 | 73 |
| #3 | h1treg | +2.34 | 78 | 55 |
| #4 | Constellation | +0.35 | 87 | 16 |
| #5 | avklhfqu -IWNL- | +0.13 | 66 | 52 |





