








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 965 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 436 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 60 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4539 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,074 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4339 | 31% |
| Smokes | 2582 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3680 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3473 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,709,870 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1192 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Notoooorious JONNE | 56% | 156 |
| #2 | himas? jussi | 50% | 44 |
| #3 | Kola Kalle | 49% | 176 |
| #4 | 𝖕1𝖑𝖑𝖎 | 46% | 103 |
| #5 | mirkovitz | 45% | 163 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Kola Kalle | 49% | 176 |
| #4 | 𝖕1𝖑𝖑𝖎 | 46% | 103 |
| #5 | mirkovitz | 45% | 163 |
| #6 | AkuHirviniemi666 | 44% | 181 |
| #7 | copkillah | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AkuHirviniemi666 | 23 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Kola Kalle | 19 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | 𝖕1𝖑𝖑𝖎 | 14 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | Notoooorious JONNE | 12 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | mirkovitz | 9 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kola Kalle | 882 | 0.24 | 22 min |
| #2 | AkuHirviniemi666 | 330 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | 𝖕1𝖑𝖑𝖎 | 220 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Notoooorious JONNE | 189 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #5 | himas? jussi | 159 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝖕1𝖑𝖑𝖎 | +3.12 | 78 | 61 |
| #2 | himas? jussi | +1.45 | 64 | 57 |
| #3 | copkillah | +0.58 | 66 | 66 |
| #4 | Kola Kalle | +0.19 | 66 | 58 |
| #5 | AkuHirviniemi666 | +0.12 | 62 | 56 |





