








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 983 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 166 matches | ||
| Premier | 162 matches | ||
| Esplay | 42 matches | 1,881 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




148 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5186 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,181 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9681 | 40% |
| Smokes | 6483 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4519 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3498 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,433,273 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 773 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Durac3llbandit.gg | 69% | 77 |
| #2 | Abbe 🐐 | 69% | 109 |
| #3 | Ljungan | 58% | 396 |
| #4 | TeeVeeoAl | 57% | 195 |
| #5 | Balban and egor | 55% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Ljungan | 58% | 396 |
| #4 | TeeVeeoAl | 57% | 195 |
| #5 | Balban and egor | 55% | 82 |
| #6 | Hasse | 50% | 135 |
| #7 | gunbacca | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ljungan | 83 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | Hasse | 41 | 0.0156 |
| #3 | Durac3llbandit.gg | 12 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | Abbe 🐐 | 8 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | TeeVeeoAl | 7 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ljungan | 1595 | 0.19 | 37 min |
| #2 | TeeVeeoAl | 339 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | Hasse | 318 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | Abbe 🐐 | 246 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | Durac3llbandit.gg | 132 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gunbacca | +1.22 | 56 | 45 |
| #2 | Docile | +1.19 | 67 | 69 |
| #3 | Ljungan | +0.81 | 53 | 64 |
| #4 | Abbe 🐐 | +0.58 | 62 | 67 |
| #5 | TeeVeeoAl | +0.51 | 65 | 53 |





