








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 282 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2535 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,241 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1085 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2160 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 1285 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 711 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $725,073 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 761 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | patsaan | 59% | 64 |
| #2 | Sasszera #Nรคpugod | 54% | 105 |
| #3 | kivipallur! | 53% | 34 |
| #4 | gamermommy7 | 48% | 29 |
| #5 | Timps | 44% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Sasszera #Nรคpugod | 54% | 105 |
| #3 | kivipallur! | 53% | 34 |
| #4 | gamermommy7 | 48% | 29 |
| #5 | Timps | 44% | 54 |
| #6 | ๐ผ๐๐ข๐๐ค๐ฉ โฟ | 43% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Timps | 13 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | Sasszera #Nรคpugod | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | kivipallur! | 7 | 0.0117 |
| #4 | ๐ผ๐๐ข๐๐ค๐ฉ โฟ | 6 | 0.0153 |
| #5 | patsaan | 5 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sasszera #Nรคpugod | 436 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | Timps | 184 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #3 | ๐ผ๐๐ข๐๐ค๐ฉ โฟ | 109 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #4 | kivipallur! | 107 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | patsaan | 78 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sasszera #Nรคpugod | +5.69 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | Timps | +0.98 | 62 | 60 |
| #3 | ruberoid | +0.90 | 76 | 38 |
| #4 | ๐ผ๐๐ข๐๐ค๐ฉ โฟ | +0.60 | 86 | 46 |
| #5 | kivipallur! | +0.14 | 67 | 47 |





