










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 556 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 139 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 44 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4575 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,281 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4362 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3168 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4052 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1699 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,090,749 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 457 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R1SKY水 | 53% | 32 |
| #2 | underidoderidoderiododeriodoo | 52% | 255 |
| #3 | Hugh G Rection | 51% | 118 |
| #4 | eGirlSlayer666 | 50% | 339 |
| #5 | Snek | 50% | 204 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | underidoderidoderiododeriodoo | 52% | 255 |
| #3 | Hugh G Rection | 51% | 118 |
| #4 | eGirlSlayer666 | 50% | 339 |
| #5 | Snek | 50% | 204 |
| #6 | Baba Yaga | 47% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eGirlSlayer666 | 22 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Hugh G Rection | 19 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | underidoderidoderiododeriodoo | 12 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | Snek | 7 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Baba Yaga | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eGirlSlayer666 | 677 | 0.10 | 18 min |
| #2 | Hugh G Rection | 485 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #3 | Snek | 304 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #4 | Baba Yaga | 222 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | underidoderidoderiododeriodoo | 166 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | R1SKY水 | +2.23 | 86 | 59 |
| #2 | eGirlSlayer666 | +1.13 | 79 | 59 |
| #3 | underidoderidoderiododeriodoo | +1.07 | 91 | 33 |
| #4 | Hugh G Rection | +0.67 | 83 | 63 |
| #5 | patty | +0.18 | 67 | 53 |





