








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 88 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 163 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3040 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,562 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2641 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2138 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2629 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2154 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $557,244 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shit country | 57% | 51 |
| #2 | Sevil | 54% | 78 |
| #3 | LUKEWOW- | 53% | 221 |
| #4 | v | 53% | 133 |
| #5 | stvnik | 51% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | LUKEWOW- | 53% | 221 |
| #4 | v | 53% | 133 |
| #5 | stvnik | 51% | 78 |
| #6 | rejdym | 50% | 58 |
| #7 | bOb-lee $w4gg3r | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shit country | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | v | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | stvnik | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | bOb-lee $w4gg3r | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LUKEWOW- | 1303 | 0.27 | 34 min |
| #2 | v | 432 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | shit country | 213 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #4 | stvnik | 146 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | rejdym | 103 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mat0x | +2.66 | 91 | 65 |
| #2 | bOb-lee $w4gg3r | +1.99 | 87 | 67 |
| #3 | shit country | +1.73 | 84 | 71 |
| #4 | Sevil | -0.31 | 75 | 59 |
| #5 | LUKEWOW- | -0.40 | 78 | 73 |





