








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 74 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
627 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,656 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 354 | 13% |
| Smokes | 814 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 839 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 649 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $361,723 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | booflol ! | 53% | 36 |
| #2 | Charlemagne | 47% | 53 |
| #3 | Brolair | 46% | 50 |
| #4 | Moojaroo | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | mojito | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Charlemagne | 47% | 53 |
| #3 | Brolair | 46% | 50 |
| #4 | Moojaroo | 39% | 28 |
| #5 | mojito | 38% | 13 |
| #6 | th3keyboard | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brolair | 9 | 0.0092 |
| #2 | Charlemagne | 3 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | booflol ! | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Moojaroo | 2 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charlemagne | 332 | 0.30 | 7 min |
| #2 | Brolair | 253 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #3 | Moojaroo | 128 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #4 | booflol ! | 80 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | mojito | 14 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charlemagne | +3.63 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | booflol ! | +1.26 | 72 | 31 |
| #3 | Brolair | -0.68 | 46 | 61 |
| #4 | th3keyboard | -0.98 | 51 | 34 |
| #5 | CorkIM | -1.82 | 46 | 45 |





