








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 13 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 105 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1414 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,656 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1134 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1098 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 702 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 722 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $267,955 of utility $41 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Retro | 39% | 122 |
| #2 | Ⓢℙ⌿⍀ℂ⋿ | 38% | 330 |
| #3 | ismokepaint | 36% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Retro | 39% | 122 |
| #2 | Ⓢℙ⌿⍀ℂ⋿ | 38% | 330 |
| #3 | ismokepaint | 36% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ⓢℙ⌿⍀ℂ⋿ | 38 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | ismokepaint | 18 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | Retro | 7 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Retro | 533 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #2 | Ⓢℙ⌿⍀ℂ⋿ | 166 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #3 | ismokepaint | 12 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ⓢℙ⌿⍀ℂ⋿ | +2.91 | 57 | 26 |
| #2 | Retro | +1.22 | 51 | 53 |
| #3 | stephysauze | -1.58 | 33 | 32 |
| #4 | ismokepaint | -3.89 | 16 | 11 |





