








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 247 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 159 matches | ||
| Premier | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 103 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2135 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,839 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2884 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2454 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1935 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3566 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,409,054 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 672 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Poneto | 41% | 75 |
| #6 | sushisan047 | 39% | 120 |
| #7 | Salty ? | 39% | 41 |
| #8 | RedArch | 39% | 72 |
| #9 | NAGU | 37% | 30 |





