








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1517 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 383 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Wingman | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7365 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,530 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7744 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7734 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6575 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6477 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,468,503 of utility $152 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 663 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Goldjunge Elias | 47% | 185 |
| #11 | t1chel | 46% | 41 |
| #12 | antiaura | 46% | 137 |
| #13 | KURZEHOSEHOLZGEWEHR | 45% | 42 |
| #14 | Seese | 43% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petri | 25 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Goldjunge Elias | 11 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Conquistador Carlitos V. | 8 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Killer Fragger Snagger | 8 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | Seese | 8 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Petri | 841 | 0.12 | 21 min |
| #2 | Goldjunge Elias | 401 | 0.11 | 10 min |
| #3 | Wolff | 212 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Killer Fragger Snagger | 212 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | wrf | 197 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Der Bauer | +3.38 | 74 | 68 |
| #2 | oterlad | +1.97 | 62 | 71 |
| #3 | Conquistador Carlitos V. | +1.34 | 57 | 48 |
| #4 | Tayx | +1.16 | 85 | 37 |
| #5 | Petri | +1.04 | 59 | 57 |





