








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 321 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2367 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,812 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1855 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2026 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1383 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1548 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,009,775 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ludwig van Beethoven | 59% | 32 |
| #2 | Solid Snake | 54% | 72 |
| #3 | Bomburio | 51% | 95 |
| #4 | Nur6ix | 50% | 20 |
| #5 | mago | 49% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mago | 13 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Bomburio | 9 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Solid Snake | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Charlie Sheesh | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Ludwig van Beethoven | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Charlie Sheesh | 188 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #2 | Solid Snake | 156 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #3 | Ludwig van Beethoven | 86 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Bomburio | 83 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | mago | 79 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mago | +3.53 | 61 | 26 |
| #2 | Pohn Jork | +2.57 | 73 | 29 |
| #3 | Henry Lee | +1.96 | 52 | 69 |
| #4 | Ludwig van Beethoven | +0.92 | 34 | 63 |
| #5 | Solid Snake | +0.59 | 24 | 51 |





