








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 544 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 429 matches | ||
| Wingman | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




84 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,679 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5921 | 38% |
| Smokes | 5161 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 3674 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 923 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,035,468 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 425 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :( | 58% | 59 |
| #2 | Hammy: | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | durim_king | 46% | 56 |
| #4 | Pearlybay | 45% | 430 |
| #5 | anastasia<3 | 35% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :( | 58% | 59 |
| #2 | Hammy: | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | durim_king | 46% | 56 |
| #4 | Pearlybay | 45% | 430 |
| #5 | anastasia<3 | 35% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pearlybay | 132 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | :( | 15 | 0.0118 |
| #3 | anastasia<3 | 14 | 0.0190 |
| #4 | durim_king | 9 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | Hammy: | 4 | 0.0081 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pearlybay | 2675 | 0.31 | 57 min |
| #2 | :( | 128 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | anastasia<3 | 62 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Hammy: | 53 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | durim_king | 12 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :( | +6.56 | 78 | 57 |
| #2 | anastasia<3 | +3.60 | 75 | 51 |
| #3 | Hammy: | +2.48 | 75 | 59 |
| #4 | durim_king | -0.00 | 44 | 39 |
| #5 | Fentanyl Lover | -0.26 | 48 | 48 |





