








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 526 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Renown | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2281 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,346 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2978 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2175 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1693 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1500 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,049,289 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carl "CJ" Johnson | 65% | 31 |
| #2 | XIMER | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | :Saltiee | 60% | 45 |
| #4 | Curf | 58% | 55 |
| #5 | jAl | 56% | 75 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | kRoss | 54% | 97 |
| #8 | Jägermeister | 54% | 28 |
| #9 | ZeWuR | 52% | 50 |
| #10 | BunBun #refrag.gg | 52% | 33 |
| #11 | | 50% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :Saltiee | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | kRoss | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Curf | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | BunBun #refrag.gg | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kRoss | 353 | 0.17 | 8 min |
| #2 | the.fisme | 243 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | :Saltiee | 212 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | Curf | 190 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | | 175 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kRoss | +1.89 | 84 | 65 |
| #2 | jAl | +1.50 | 83 | 43 |
| #3 | Curf | +1.47 | 80 | 63 |
| #4 | | +1.11 | 76 | 59 |
| #5 | :Saltiee | +1.08 | 78 | 73 |





