








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 481 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
857 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,504 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 344 | 23% |
| Smokes | 387 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 351 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 422 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $210,366 of utility $44 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 194 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | T1zerDon | 36% | 106 |
| #7 | Toomas Sularaha | 35% | 57 |
| #8 | mass | 33% | 30 |
| #9 | kris_wallhacks | 30% | 56 |
| #10 | HDSass | 26% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PRIME FNCS | 49 | 0.0450 |
| #2 | kris_wallhacks | 24 | 0.0233 |
| #3 | T1zerDon | 21 | 0.0105 |
| #4 | Toomas Sularaha | 18 | 0.0198 |
| #5 | Dangerous Dan | 15 | 0.0235 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kris_wallhacks | 334 | 0.32 | 4 min |
| #2 | PRIME FNCS | 273 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #3 | T1zerDon | 168 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | HDSass | 113 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | Dangerous Dan | 82 | 0.13 | 2 min |





