








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 51 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 285 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Renown | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




166 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8050 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,266 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7190 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4560 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 8283 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 4233 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $857,377 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 403 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F3N0L | 72% | 32 |
| #2 | Authentic | 64% | 28 |
| #3 | Hugh jass | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Scavenger | 58% | 31 |
| #5 | TopShotKenny | 58% | 116 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TopShotKenny | 28 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | Mozzarellaaa | 9 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | Scorp | 5 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | F3N0L | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Scavenger | 3 | 0.0048 |





