








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 167 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1786 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,342 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1817 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1894 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1781 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1850 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $444,443 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SupaFreak | 52% | 27 |
| #2 | Braxty | 47% | 15 |
| #3 | DARK MikeisGod | 44% | 18 |
| #4 | alski | 40% | 15 |
| #5 | Drater Gib | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | alski | 40% | 15 |
| #5 | Drater Gib | 38% | 24 |
| #6 | Tydy3 | 29% | 14 |
| #7 | DreamzMeister | 29% | 14 |
| #8 | OogybeAr | 22% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Drater Gib | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Tydy3 | 2 | 0.0069 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OogybeAr | 139 | 0.37 | 4 min |
| #2 | Drater Gib | 123 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #3 | SupaFreak | 91 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | DARK MikeisGod | 65 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | alski | 63 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DARK MikeisGod | +1.46 | 76 | 80 |
| #2 | Drater Gib | +0.83 | 81 | 72 |
| #3 | alski | -0.25 | 70 | 60 |
| #4 | SupaFreak | -0.52 | 46 | 63 |
| #5 | m6rs | -0.65 | 76 | 62 |





