










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 230 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2387 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,922 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2201 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1133 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2213 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2375 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $903,204 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 13 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BRJÁLAÐUR | 69% | 32 |
| #2 | »→DuRgUr99←« | 67% | 97 |
| #3 | VESEN | 65% | 43 |
| #4 | M0rall | 63% | 30 |
| #5 | Danvoss911™ | 62% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stymmiano | 70 | 0.0175 |
| #2 | HaffiKaffi | 13 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | 2Tap Shakur | 11 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | asicooper98 | 9 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | DAF ツ | 6 | 0.0087 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stymmiano | 573 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #2 | asicooper98 | 476 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #3 | »→DuRgUr99←« | 173 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | DAF ツ | 152 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | HaffiKaffi | 140 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stymmiano | +7.49 | 87 | 58 |
| #2 | asicooper98 | +5.27 | 75 | 64 |
| #3 | M0rall | +4.38 | 84 | 59 |
| #4 | »→DuRgUr99←« | +2.94 | 81 | 63 |
| #5 | 2Tap Shakur | +2.81 | 57 | 57 |





