








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 84 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 609 matches | ||
| Faceit | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




177 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5141 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,675 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2473 | 14% |
| Smokes | 4482 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5129 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 5591 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,695,417 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 151 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mid | 54% | 72 |
| #2 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | 50% | 254 |
| #3 | ZanderHulkYT | 50% | 70 |
| #4 | Haiym22 | 50% | 168 |
| #5 | 運命 | 50% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ilMoose | 48% | 66 |
| #8 | quinn! | 47% | 49 |
| #9 | bottomfrag #shitters | 47% | 47 |
| #10 | Gilld Chese | 45% | 230 |
| #11 | Coconaras | 43% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | 82 | 0.0151 |
| #2 | 運命 | 81 | 0.0281 |
| #3 | Haiym22 | 58 | 0.0161 |
| #4 | Nunget6124 | 57 | 0.0128 |
| #5 | Gilld Chese | 56 | 0.0113 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Haiym22 | 446 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #2 | Gilld Chese | 393 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #3 | Coconaras | 391 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #4 | 運命 | 379 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #5 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | 224 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | +5.79 | 75 | 53 |
| #2 | Haiym22 | +2.84 | 69 | 59 |
| #3 | 運命 | +1.48 | 87 | 43 |
| #4 | ZanderHulkYT | +0.22 | 64 | 44 |
| #5 | Mid | -0.12 | 52 | 54 |





