








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 482 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 669 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 103 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




171 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6351 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 23,559 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4547 | 19% |
| Smokes | 6829 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4977 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 7206 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,433,035 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 759 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mid | 55% | 53 |
| #2 | 運命 | 51% | 239 |
| #3 | Coconaras | 49% | 335 |
| #4 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | 49% | 590 |
| #5 | Nunget6124 | 46% | 309 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Nunget6124 | 46% | 309 |
| #6 | Haiym21 | 45% | 230 |
| #7 | Haiym22 | 41% | 133 |
| #8 | bottomfrag #shitters | 40% | 98 |
| #9 | ilMoose | 39% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | 153 | 0.0122 |
| #2 | 運命 | 125 | 0.0248 |
| #3 | Haiym21 | 94 | 0.0191 |
| #4 | Nunget6124 | 62 | 0.0093 |
| #5 | Coconaras | 40 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Coconaras | 1906 | 0.27 | 53 min |
| #2 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | 713 | 0.06 | 20 min |
| #3 | 運命 | 645 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #4 | Haiym21 | 314 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #5 | Haiym22 | 309 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkibidiGoonRizzlet | +4.89 | 75 | 56 |
| #2 | Mid | +3.86 | 77 | 54 |
| #3 | 運命 | +1.13 | 87 | 49 |
| #4 | Haiym22 | +0.41 | 60 | 51 |
| #5 | Coconaras | -0.80 | 46 | 80 |





