








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 69 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2215 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,331 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1758 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1043 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1412 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1118 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $383,067 of utility $108 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 601 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ViperFish | 63% | 32 |
| #2 | Ute Uncle Barry | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Just Seán | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | pesso | 56% | 63 |
| #5 | tejAs | 54% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kyoto | +4.63 | 87 | 48 |
| #2 | ViperFish | +2.54 | 91 | 62 |
| #3 | Ute Uncle Barry | +1.51 | 68 | 56 |
| #4 | Just Seán | +0.34 | 72 | 54 |
| #5 | Kitsu ໒꒱ | +0.17 | 46 | 56 |





