








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 358 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 230 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 126 matches | ||
| Wingman | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7478 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,054 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2630 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2441 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 1518 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 465 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,997,093 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 633 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kirb | 49% | 99 |
| #2 | joe | 47% | 58 |
| #3 | Skibidi_Aardvark1297 | 41% | 130 |
| #4 | shut up im hungover | 38% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kirb | 49% | 99 |
| #2 | joe | 47% | 58 |
| #3 | Skibidi_Aardvark1297 | 41% | 130 |
| #4 | shut up im hungover | 38% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kirb | 12 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | joe | 6 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | shut up im hungover | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Skibidi_Aardvark1297 | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shut up im hungover | 134 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | kirb | 79 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | joe | 67 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Skibidi_Aardvark1297 | 32 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CHINA | +1.71 | 64 | 43 |
| #2 | kirb | -0.48 | 61 | 25 |
| #3 | joe | -1.45 | 37 | 29 |
| #4 | shut up im hungover | -3.09 | 17 | 44 |
| #5 | Skibidi_Aardvark1297 | -3.21 | 35 | 9 |





