








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 289 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 251 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3544 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 370 | 11% |
| Smokes | 859 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 448 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 1649 | 50% |
Our logs show you have wasted $382,651 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 527 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bombardino Crocodillo | 69% | 52 |
| #2 | MCMikey | 62% | 50 |
| #3 | Nicky | 56% | 39 |
| #4 | holy bible | 54% | 46 |
| #5 | shut up im hungover | 49% | 176 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | shut up im hungover | 396 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | kirb | 161 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #3 | CHINA | 148 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nicky | 123 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | joe | 102 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | holy bible | +5.37 | 70 | 29 |
| #2 | Nicky | +4.56 | 79 | 45 |
| #3 | CHINA | +1.34 | 58 | 39 |
| #4 | Bombardino Crocodillo | +1.06 | 33 | 19 |
| #5 | joe | +0.69 | 36 | 26 |





