








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Wingman | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2676 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,990 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1813 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1523 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1065 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1589 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $658,954 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TuuKK4 | 61% | 33 |
| #2 | b1nb0ns | 55% | 33 |
| #3 | Janppa | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | Mira | 50% | 28 |
| #5 | RaNe | 47% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | RaNe | 47% | 19 |
| #6 | Viljis | 39% | 18 |
| #7 | ☣Eijou88☣ | 38% | 21 |
| #8 | ApEx (FIN) | 33% | 24 |
| #9 | ❤☠𝕵𝖔𝖘𝖘𝖚☠❤ | 32% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TuuKK4 | 13 | 0.0206 |
| #2 | b1nb0ns | 6 | 0.0100 |
| #3 | ApEx (FIN) | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | ☣Eijou88☣ | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Viljis | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☣Eijou88☣ | 71 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #2 | Viljis | 48 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | RaNe | 40 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | TuuKK4 | 32 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Janppa | 26 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TuuKK4 | +3.45 | 76 | 37 |
| #2 | Hanski ︻芫 一 | +1.95 | 50 | 52 |
| #3 | RaNe | +0.42 | 48 | 67 |
| #4 | Janppa | +0.41 | 38 | 64 |
| #5 | Viljis | -0.99 | 39 | 64 |





