








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 604 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 365 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2031 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,600 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2751 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1277 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 2807 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2765 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,117,625 of utility $221 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 435 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #12 | Rusty_Frannie | 31% | 67 |
| #13 | FluffyFlamingo | 31% | 42 |
| #14 | NOVA✪ | 29% | 69 |
| #15 | SlxttyMooMoo | 27% | 37 |
| #16 | Savage.D.Unicorn | 24% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 💙❤ Zena ❤💙 | 11 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | L0neWolf4k | 10 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | DJ_VorteX | 8 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Vlokkie | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | Lexor | 5 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | atCanis | +7.36 | 63 | 47 |
| #2 | L0neWolf4k | +5.19 | 67 | 52 |
| #3 | NOVA✪ | +2.30 | 69 | 42 |
| #4 | @n4c0nd4 | +1.92 | 45 | 56 |
| #5 | AlphaR | -0.20 | 43 | 53 |





