










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1964 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4398 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,647 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1632 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1941 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2418 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 656 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,891,085 of utility $255 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 469 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | firechips0 | 78% | 23 |
| #2 | δΊΊ | 73% | 30 |
| #3 | ζ΅·εΊζ | 69% | 194 |
| #4 | Energyγ£ | 68% | 57 |
| #5 | Yu | 67% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | δΊΊ | 73% | 30 |
| #3 | ζ΅·εΊζ | 69% | 194 |
| #4 | Energyγ£ | 68% | 57 |
| #5 | Yu | 67% | 111 |
| #6 | MangoGreenTea | 66% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ζ΅·εΊζ | 18 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | Yu | 9 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | MangoGreenTea | 6 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | δΊΊ | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | Energyγ£ | 2 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Energyγ£ | 256 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #2 | ζ΅·εΊζ | 158 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | Yu | 152 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | δΊΊ | 130 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #5 | firechips0 | 58 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | π΅πππ | +4.48 | 72 | 43 |
| #2 | Yu | +1.57 | 62 | 49 |
| #3 | ζ΅·εΊζ | +1.17 | 67 | 33 |
| #4 | δΊΊ | -0.06 | 56 | 47 |
| #5 | MangoGreenTea | -0.76 | 55 | 30 |





