








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 140 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1299 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,286 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1943 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2299 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1795 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2249 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,958 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 728 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cr4x2y | 85% | 27 |
| #2 | Simmik | 80% | 20 |
| #3 | sn1pe | 79% | 28 |
| #4 | Visible | 75% | 16 |
| #5 | Merzo | 73% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Merzo | 73% | 11 |
| #6 | Mordaqie | 67% | 15 |
| #7 | KN4PII | 61% | 114 |
| #8 | W1nther*JR | 59% | 34 |
| #9 | AbaKD | 48% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AbaKD | 3 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | W1nther*JR | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | KN4PII | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Visible | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KN4PII | 433 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | W1nther*JR | 114 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | cr4x2y | 84 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | sn1pe | 81 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | AbaKD | 80 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sn1pe | +3.71 | 70 | 56 |
| #2 | AbaKD | +2.71 | 73 | 77 |
| #3 | W1nther*JR | +2.47 | 82 | 75 |
| #4 | Visible | +1.46 | 79 | 60 |
| #5 | Merzo | +0.93 | 87 | 72 |





