








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 274 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1927 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,933 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 926 | 48% |
| Smokes | 466 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 440 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 101 | 5% |
Our logs show you have wasted $531,265 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oogalieboogalie | 80% | 20 |
| #2 | капустка-PEEK swagst3r | 63% | 27 |
| #3 | CrowEnjoyer | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | Generic | 55% | 96 |
| #5 | USSR-DDoS | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oogalieboogalie | 80% | 20 |
| #2 | капустка-PEEK swagst3r | 63% | 27 |
| #3 | CrowEnjoyer | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | Generic | 55% | 96 |
| #5 | USSR-DDoS | 43% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Generic | 21 | 0.0102 |
| #2 | USSR-DDoS | 12 | 0.0098 |
| #3 | CrowEnjoyer | 6 | 0.0165 |
| #4 | капустка-PEEK swagst3r | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Generic | 169 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | USSR-DDoS | 57 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | oogalieboogalie | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | капустка-PEEK swagst3r | 15 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | CrowEnjoyer | 7 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | USSR-DDoS | +6.87 | 89 | 36 |
| #2 | Generic | +1.80 | 75 | 46 |
| #3 | oogalieboogalie | +1.46 | 78 | 44 |
| #4 | CrowEnjoyer | +0.20 | 78 | 40 |
| #5 | SkibidiSwedistan15 | +0.06 | 70 | 28 |





