








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 320 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1675 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,239 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2713 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2050 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2047 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1429 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $297,140 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1254 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | folabeJ | 53% | 17 |
| #2 | JurasKaposts <3 | 48% | 80 |
| #3 | ahilejs23 | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | Foxxy | 44% | 16 |
| #5 | justid31 | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | JurasKaposts <3 | 48% | 80 |
| #3 | ahilejs23 | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | Foxxy | 44% | 16 |
| #5 | justid31 | 44% | 16 |
| #6 | NixOn | 20% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JurasKaposts <3 | 11 | 0.0072 |
| #2 | Foxxy | 3 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | folabeJ | 2 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | justid31 | 1 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | NixOn | 1 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JurasKaposts <3 | 192 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | justid31 | 44 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | ahilejs23 | 42 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Foxxy | 36 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | folabeJ | 31 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JurasKaposts <3 | +1.85 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | folabeJ | +1.80 | 52 | 55 |
| #3 | ahilejs23 | +0.84 | 66 | 45 |
| #4 | justid31 | +0.55 | 66 | 64 |
| #5 | Aga | -0.10 | 79 | 66 |





