










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 84 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 114 matches | ||
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1656 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,187 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 639 | 10% |
| Smokes | 2824 | 46% |
| HE Grenades | 1979 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 745 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,498 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 69 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mops 2.0 | 57% | 21 |
| #2 | U235 | 53% | 135 |
| #3 | 0wnz | 52% | 190 |
| #4 | DILDEP | 50% | 108 |
| #5 | mops | 50% | 191 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DILDEP | 14 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | mops | 10 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | 0wnz | 10 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | U235 | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | mops 2.0 | 6 | 0.0139 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0wnz | 538 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #2 | DILDEP | 358 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #3 | mops | 224 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | aeaeae9 | 163 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | U235 | 121 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mops | +2.56 | 59 | 52 |
| #2 | 0wnz | +1.45 | 62 | 72 |
| #3 | mops 2.0 | +1.32 | 47 | 62 |
| #4 | aeaeae9 | -0.30 | 33 | 57 |
| #5 | DILDEP | -1.09 | 34 | 67 |





