








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 544 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 207 matches | ||
| Faceit | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,445 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2733 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3365 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4007 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3340 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,391,615 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 240 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ouch | 50% | 50 |
| #10 | JachPot | 48% | 31 |
| #11 | Dragonborn | 46% | 52 |
| #12 | Shane216 | 40% | 20 |
| #13 | Niffrus | 36% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ouch | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | Chraze | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Jystir | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Chicken | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | VikesCatgirl | 2 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jystir | 296 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | ouch | 216 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #3 | Niffrus | 206 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #4 | JachPot | 183 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #5 | Hawkish | 105 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chraze | +1.74 | 83 | 55 |
| #2 | VikesCatgirl | +1.43 | 68 | 63 |
| #3 | DENT.GG Niffrus is Daddy | +0.48 | 79 | 57 |
| #4 | Dragonborn | +0.39 | 69 | 52 |
| #5 | Jystir | +0.20 | 61 | 75 |





