










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
299 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 749 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 239 | 32% |
| Smokes | 285 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 201 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 24 | 3% |
Our logs show you have wasted $190,827 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floowen | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | NebulA | 37% | 43 |
| #3 | Felix | 35% | 37 |
| #4 | D0denT | 31% | 35 |
| #5 | Mejiro Ujang | 30% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | NebulA | 37% | 43 |
| #3 | Felix | 35% | 37 |
| #4 | D0denT | 31% | 35 |
| #5 | Mejiro Ujang | 30% | 37 |
| #6 | BlackRiveria | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NebulA | 6 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Floowen | 4 | 0.0167 |
| #3 | Felix | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | D0denT | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Felix | 45 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | Floowen | 40 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | NebulA | 35 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | D0denT | 27 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #5 | BlackRiveria | 3 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Floowen | +4.48 | 35 | 53 |
| #2 | D0denT | +3.38 | 50 | 45 |
| #3 | NebulA | +1.96 | 42 | 34 |
| #4 | BlackRiveria | +0.22 | 61 | 13 |
| #5 | Oguri | -1.93 | 5 | 36 |





