








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 573 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 189 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 81 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 60 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 29 matches | ||
| Premier | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4832 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,711 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5018 | 22% |
| Smokes | 6988 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 8489 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 2216 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,396,468 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1195 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stel | 50% | 115 |
| #2 | ismail1212 | 50% | 330 |
| #3 | Sxkunax | 50% | 560 |
| #4 | Captain Vlis | 47% | 131 |
| #5 | Evmorfia | 45% | 245 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Sxkunax | 50% | 560 |
| #4 | Captain Vlis | 47% | 131 |
| #5 | Evmorfia | 45% | 245 |
| #6 | Crashout | 44% | 71 |
| #7 | Sjefkeee | 41% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sxkunax | 88 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | ismail1212 | 62 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | Stel | 27 | 0.0119 |
| #4 | Crashout | 27 | 0.0188 |
| #5 | Sjefkeee | 20 | 0.0193 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sxkunax | 1034 | 0.09 | 16 min |
| #2 | Stel | 913 | 0.40 | 18 min |
| #3 | ismail1212 | 727 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #4 | Crashout | 314 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #5 | Evmorfia | 177 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ismail1212 | +4.37 | 68 | 66 |
| #2 | Crashout | +2.20 | 35 | 55 |
| #3 | Sxkunax | +1.92 | 70 | 32 |
| #4 | Stel | +1.03 | 54 | 60 |
| #5 | Captain Vlis | -1.78 | 41 | 15 |





