










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
447 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,036 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 213 | 21% |
| Smokes | 287 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 141 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 395 | 38% |
Our logs show you have wasted $640,398 of utility $326 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 59 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KnaipeX | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | Banz | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | ph65bee | 60% | 5 |
| #4 | MiRePo93 | 60% | 15 |
| #5 | Eksu | 59% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Ipa | 53% | 66 |
| #8 | ficti | 52% | 21 |
| #9 | Azunyan | 50% | 14 |
| #10 | BrainDamage | 50% | 38 |
| #11 | Pawel | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ipa | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Skrubu | 3 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Pawel | 2 | 0.0140 |
| #4 | Eksu | 1 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | KnaipeX | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ipa | 153 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | Skrubu | 118 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | Eksu | 60 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | ficti | 40 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | BrainDamage | 38 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KnaipeX | +7.00 | 88 | 66 |
| #2 | Ipa | +5.80 | 89 | 73 |
| #3 | Pawel | +2.78 | 76 | 49 |
| #4 | Eksu | +2.57 | 65 | 66 |
| #5 | MiRePo93 | +1.88 | 75 | 62 |





