








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 840 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 672 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9140 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7637 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7380 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6308 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6529 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,402,468 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 417 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | axel | 58% | 84 |
| #2 | Spesiaali | 57% | 91 |
| #3 | Hobo with Shotgun | 55% | 60 |
| #4 | ツ | 55% | 42 |
| #5 | lartza | 53% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noa!m | 11 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | ♿Tsekkipiiska♿ | 10 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | lartza | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Henkisesti silver | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | RUMPPO | 6 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Henkisesti silver | 664 | 0.10 | 20 min |
| #2 | NyyTTi ToPi =DDd | 643 | 0.22 | 22 min |
| #3 | ♿Tsekkipiiska♿ | 561 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| #4 | lartza | 554 | 0.10 | 16 min |
| #5 | Noa!m | 447 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NyyTTi ToPi =DDd | +2.80 | 82 | 83 |
| #2 | 4llwaysBad | +2.36 | 55 | 61 |
| #3 | axel | +2.28 | 73 | 65 |
| #4 | ★Peltzi★ | +2.13 | 75 | 51 |
| #5 | ツ | +1.72 | 81 | 54 |





