








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 288 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 452 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




46 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3220 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,632 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3282 | 24% |
| Smokes | 5467 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 2482 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2401 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,797,439 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | BigLot | 42% | 116 |
| #10 | Mogger | 42% | 137 |
| #11 | Brendan Fraser | 41% | 94 |
| #12 | GoBolts | 37% | 57 |
| #13 | Arthur Morgan | 34% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Buk | 36 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Blazin_Bolt | 12 | 0.0090 |
| #3 | Ballin' | 7 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Mogger | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Busta | 5 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Buk | 652 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #2 | Mogger | 319 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Blazin_Bolt | 296 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #4 | Ballin' | 285 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #5 | BigLot | 149 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Barry | +5.93 | 64 | 60 |
| #2 | Ballin' | +5.34 | 66 | 66 |
| #3 | Buk | +2.68 | 75 | 51 |
| #4 | Fortin' with Will | +1.93 | 73 | 59 |
| #5 | TH | +1.84 | 63 | 58 |





