








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 97 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
878 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,467 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 631 | 26% |
| Smokes | 690 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 605 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 541 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $283,309 of utility $169 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 206 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 「♡」 | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | Anakn | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | Branel | 50% | 6 |
| #4 | Phishy | 47% | 17 |
| #5 | 𝔲𝔷𝔦 | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anakn | 3 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | Phishy | 3 | 0.0096 |
| #3 | bloodymary2750 | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | 𝔲𝔷𝔦 | 2 | 0.0080 |
| #5 | 「♡」 | 1 | 0.0050 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anakn | 74 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | Phishy | 39 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | DizZy | 37 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | 𝔲𝔷𝔦 | 24 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | diana | 14 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phishy | +2.81 | 68 | 49 |
| #2 | Anakn | +1.03 | 78 | 68 |
| #3 | 「♡」 | +1.03 | 83 | 69 |
| #4 | DizZy | -0.51 | 76 | 62 |
| #5 | 𝔲𝔷𝔦 | -2.43 | 72 | 53 |





