








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1069 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 397 matches | ||
| Faceit | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6909 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,271 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5415 | 25% |
| Smokes | 6359 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 3759 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5738 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,377,441 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 992 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paper | 53% | 83 |
| #2 | ree | 51% | 101 |
| #3 | Dönatello | 51% | 47 |
| #4 | NoSkill_IzDa | 50% | 32 |
| #5 | ZapzZapZerapp | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | min :> | 49% | 99 |
| #9 | l†lbo | 49% | 69 |
| #10 | yungff | 49% | 41 |
| #11 | youngdr4go ツ | 48% | 44 |
| #12 | aLxB ♿ | 45% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | l†lbo | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | min :> | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | ree | 6 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | paper | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | aLxB ♿ | 3 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | min :> | 650 | 0.30 | 19 min |
| #2 | aLxB ♿ | 403 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #3 | ree | 313 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #4 | paper | 270 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | l†lbo | 201 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ree | +2.49 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | l†lbo | +2.19 | 87 | 66 |
| #3 | HNL MrDeluXe | +1.70 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | min :> | +1.63 | 83 | 77 |
| #5 | No4h | +0.31 | 76 | 62 |





