








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1461 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 392 matches | ||
| Faceit | 123 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8496 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,067 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6547 | 25% |
| Smokes | 7175 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6370 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5975 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,507,585 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 932 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | No4h | 51% | 101 |
| #10 | Hasslon | 51% | 72 |
| #11 | ◥◣ el Ganza ◢◤ | 51% | 84 |
| #12 | skyye_#low | 40% | 60 |
| #13 | Mrs Devil | 30% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KarlS | 27 | 0.0155 |
| #2 | min :> | 11 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | l†lbo | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | No4h | 8 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Longs drückt ab und zu | 8 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | min :> | 1105 | 0.29 | 33 min |
| #2 | Gravy | 806 | 0.37 | 23 min |
| #3 | l†lbo | 522 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #4 | knobta | 330 | 0.40 | 9 min |
| #5 | No4h | 329 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ree | +2.20 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | min :> | +1.95 | 82 | 79 |
| #3 | l†lbo | +1.56 | 83 | 68 |
| #4 | Hasslon | +0.98 | 76 | 46 |
| #5 | skyye_#low | +0.97 | 70 | 60 |





