








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 587 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Faceit | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 71 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4866 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,982 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3156 | 19% |
| Smokes | 5997 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 4157 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3672 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,114,414 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1088 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Bisse-Nisse | 61% | 175 |
| #4 | トクステリ | 59% | 75 |
| #5 | steffe=D | 59% | 29 |
| #6 | s<e.r-,fg-.aserg,.-sg,s.- | 57% | 139 |
| #7 | musti | 57% | 335 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | musti | 51 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | s<e.r-,fg-.aserg,.-sg,s.- | 13 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Bisse-Nisse | 9 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | steffe=D | 4 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | BIGmac | 3 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | musti | +4.24 | 96 | 73 |
| #2 | steffe=D | +4.21 | 84 | 72 |
| #3 | s<e.r-,fg-.aserg,.-sg,s.- | +4.04 | 96 | 72 |
| #4 | Bisse-Nisse | +1.48 | 82 | 75 |
| #5 | k0walski | -0.43 | 51 | 69 |





