








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 456 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 226 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4142 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,931 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4269 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3641 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3568 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3453 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $951,254 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 720 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓼𝓽𝔂𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 | 71% | 34 |
| #2 | MANDAKH SLAYER | 66% | 29 |
| #3 | z | 63% | 27 |
| #4 | chill daddy | 61% | 31 |
| #5 | youngboy_ | 60% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ABC | 51% | 43 |
| #8 | 七転び八起き | 51% | 71 |
| #9 | WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!!! | 50% | 56 |
| #10 | shibaguu | 50% | 60 |
| #11 | Smile | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Niko | 16 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | 七転び八起き | 8 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | MANDAKH SLAYER | 2 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | chill daddy | 2 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | shibaguu | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Niko | 406 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | 七転び八起き | 306 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!!! | 170 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | ABC | 135 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | shibaguu | 123 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | z | +3.85 | 95 | 45 |
| #2 | Get Better | +2.25 | 79 | 68 |
| #3 | chill daddy | +1.45 | 70 | 38 |
| #4 | ABC | +0.88 | 63 | 61 |
| #5 | 七転び八起き | +0.35 | 76 | 53 |





