








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 113 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 137 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1555 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,476 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 889 | 20% |
| Smokes | 809 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1332 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1446 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $450,060 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 71 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ronti | 63% | 38 |
| #2 | Jönö | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Kolikkoheli2000 | 58% | 88 |
| #4 | Tapsa | 56% | 112 |
| #5 | ✪ El G~U~C~C~I | 55% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tapsa | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | Kolikkoheli2000 | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | henqka | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kolikkoheli2000 | 320 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #2 | ✪ El G~U~C~C~I | 312 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #3 | Tapsa | 255 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | henqka | 151 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #5 | Ronti | 94 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jönö | +2.27 | 70 | 58 |
| #2 | Tapsa | +1.35 | 56 | 62 |
| #3 | ✪ El G~U~C~C~I | +1.27 | 75 | 64 |
| #4 | Kolikkoheli2000 | +0.54 | 76 | 67 |
| #5 | henqka | -0.03 | 58 | 77 |





