








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 132 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
544 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,973 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 510 | 26% |
| Smokes | 444 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 558 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 461 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $259,629 of utility $208 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 47 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jölleni | 75% | 8 |
| #2 | Kysb0b | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | H1t0rM1ss? | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | ✩Krinkeli✩ | 61% | 33 |
| #5 | ophelia | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | H1t0rM1ss? | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | ✩Krinkeli✩ | 61% | 33 |
| #5 | ophelia | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | BOOZEMAN | 33% | 6 |
| #7 | Kalkkuna kalle | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kysb0b | 2 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | ✩Krinkeli✩ | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | jölleni | 1 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H1t0rM1ss? | 41 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #2 | ✩Krinkeli✩ | 31 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | ophelia | 29 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | jölleni | 26 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kysb0b | 20 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kysb0b | +3.23 | 73 | 33 |
| #2 | ✩Krinkeli✩ | +1.56 | 69 | 64 |
| #3 | BOOZEMAN | +1.31 | 71 | 68 |
| #4 | ophelia | +1.02 | 78 | 68 |
| #5 | jölleni | +0.88 | 70 | 45 |





