








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 352 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 277 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3216 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,890 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1385 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2025 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3182 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 2298 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,162,834 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 407 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nasty | 61% | 33 |
| #2 | ahma | 57% | 88 |
| #3 | jölleni | 53% | 144 |
| #4 | Kysb0b | 53% | 207 |
| #5 | H1t0rM1ss? | 52% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | jölleni | 53% | 144 |
| #4 | Kysb0b | 53% | 207 |
| #5 | H1t0rM1ss? | 52% | 46 |
| #6 | ophelia | 52% | 66 |
| #7 | Kalkkuna kalle | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jölleni | 19 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Kysb0b | 11 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | Kalkkuna kalle | 5 | 0.0065 |
| #4 | ahma | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | ophelia | 4 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ophelia | 255 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | ahma | 233 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | jölleni | 190 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | Kysb0b | 170 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | H1t0rM1ss? | 106 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ahma | +2.30 | 73 | 66 |
| #2 | ✩Krinkeli✩ | +1.46 | 71 | 60 |
| #3 | ophelia | +1.07 | 78 | 64 |
| #4 | Kysb0b | +0.77 | 67 | 43 |
| #5 | jölleni | +0.42 | 64 | 46 |





