








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 521 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 116 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,914 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1747 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1481 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1847 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 839 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $983,671 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 443 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ur Ass Mine | 73% | 30 |
| #2 | 대한민국 해군 | 68% | 79 |
| #3 | 바랜별 | 64% | 61 |
| #4 | ORI | 64% | 72 |
| #5 | Lippice | 59% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⱽ⁴ˢᴱ | 10 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | OPIUM* | 9 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | 무장 강도 | 6 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | ✘Ⱉ✘ | 6 | 0.0086 |
| #5 | ORI | 5 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 무장 강도 | 581 | 0.36 | 11 min |
| #2 | 바랜별 | 395 | 0.35 | 8 min |
| #3 | ⱽ⁴ˢᴱ | 298 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | pumkn | 259 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #5 | Ur Ass Mine | 152 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Qrutial | +6.24 | 93 | 52 |
| #2 | 대한민국 해군 | +3.57 | 59 | 56 |
| #3 | [N_Droid]™ | +1.44 | 51 | 57 |
| #4 | Ur Ass Mine | +1.38 | 52 | 64 |
| #5 | pumkn | +1.36 | 66 | 62 |





