








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 982 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1204 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 168 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9046 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,818 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6365 | 18% |
| Smokes | 7397 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 10638 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 11418 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,374,617 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 589 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trash Talker Panda | 72% | 116 |
| #2 | ⊹Jama | 60% | 156 |
| #3 | Amyzing | 51% | 112 |
| #4 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 46% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trash Talker Panda | 72% | 116 |
| #2 | ⊹Jama | 60% | 156 |
| #3 | Amyzing | 51% | 112 |
| #4 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 46% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 14 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | ⊹Jama | 11 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | Trash Talker Panda | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Amyzing | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⊹Jama | 357 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | Trash Talker Panda | 245 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Amyzing | 213 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | 209 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Trash Talker Panda | +8.33 | 97 | 69 |
| #2 | ⊹Jama | +5.86 | 97 | 71 |
| #3 | ♚i5-𝘙𝘦𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 | +2.68 | 88 | 63 |
| #4 | JAYSMERK (new keybinds + knife) | -1.42 | 59 | 50 |
| #5 | Amyzing | -5.75 | 21 | 54 |





