








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1063 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 186 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,765 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2904 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2150 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1355 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1356 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $879,011 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 349 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vedexi | 50% | 189 |
| #2 | SigmaCake (Peksin poju) | 49% | 49 |
| #3 | BETAKLAKE | 49% | 131 |
| #4 | obbe | 46% | 89 |
| #5 | Aksu | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vedexi | 638 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | Aksu | 242 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #3 | obbe | 183 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | BETAKLAKE | 165 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | SigmaCake (Peksin poju) | 103 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aksu | +2.72 | 72 | 63 |
| #2 | PillowHunter | +1.72 | 59 | 58 |
| #3 | SigmaCake (Peksin poju) | +0.38 | 68 | 53 |
| #4 | vedexi | +0.11 | 66 | 49 |
| #5 | BETAKLAKE | -0.25 | 41 | 45 |





